I slept naked in my papyrus bed that night after
torturing ugali omena (ugali and
sardines).
As I slept, I snored with my mouth wide open and mosquitoes would fly into my mouth. I opened my mouth and otitmach (fire flies) flying towards my mouth and having never seen them, I shouted "THE MOSQUITOES ARE NOW COMING WITH TORCHES."
I then slept back and at around 12am, the night runner came and threw sand on my mabati roof then I said, leonileo, lazimanimshikemchawihuyu. (Today I must catch this night runner) This guy used to scare me until my tongue could produce bitter saliva than unripe mangoes.
Sometimes he'd throw the sand then I fart. But today I armed myself with a club the size of the buttocks of a momoelephant just waiting to beat a burukenge(monitor lizard) who makes my nights a prison. I opened the unbolted door slowly then crawled into the banana trees and waited because after throwing the sand, he normally ran away for 5 minutes so that he comes back naked. Then he came and knelt down like a sprinter in olympics. I was so angered but I had to wait for him to start sprinting towards the banana trees then "BANG!" I club him down. As he knelt he whispered, "onto your marks, set, go". Instead of go, this guy began to jog and whisper, "jang'wechmurritikwodho, murritikwodho (athlete warm up, warm up and fart) and as he jogged rhythmically, he also farted rhythmically, "PRR !PRR !PRR !PRR !PRR !"
I found this so funny and instead of chasing the man, I laughed like Lot's wife who thought that licking sugar was funny and could prevent her from being salt. I laughed and shouted the guys name, "HAHAHAHAHAHAHAHA ! OMWANDHOOO KARA IN MIIRA !"(Omwandhoits just you who runs around my homestead) Omwandho Bolted faster than Usain as I kept laughing while my rungu cried because it didn't perform its duty in the agreed contract.
[ B.O.B © Copyright 2014, Night Runner Things]
As I slept, I snored with my mouth wide open and mosquitoes would fly into my mouth. I opened my mouth and otitmach (fire flies) flying towards my mouth and having never seen them, I shouted "THE MOSQUITOES ARE NOW COMING WITH TORCHES."
I then slept back and at around 12am, the night runner came and threw sand on my mabati roof then I said, leonileo, lazimanimshikemchawihuyu. (Today I must catch this night runner) This guy used to scare me until my tongue could produce bitter saliva than unripe mangoes.
Sometimes he'd throw the sand then I fart. But today I armed myself with a club the size of the buttocks of a momoelephant just waiting to beat a burukenge(monitor lizard) who makes my nights a prison. I opened the unbolted door slowly then crawled into the banana trees and waited because after throwing the sand, he normally ran away for 5 minutes so that he comes back naked. Then he came and knelt down like a sprinter in olympics. I was so angered but I had to wait for him to start sprinting towards the banana trees then "BANG!" I club him down. As he knelt he whispered, "onto your marks, set, go". Instead of go, this guy began to jog and whisper, "jang'wechmurritikwodho, murritikwodho (athlete warm up, warm up and fart) and as he jogged rhythmically, he also farted rhythmically, "PRR !PRR !PRR !PRR !PRR !"
I found this so funny and instead of chasing the man, I laughed like Lot's wife who thought that licking sugar was funny and could prevent her from being salt. I laughed and shouted the guys name, "HAHAHAHAHAHAHAHA ! OMWANDHOOO KARA IN MIIRA !"(Omwandhoits just you who runs around my homestead) Omwandho Bolted faster than Usain as I kept laughing while my rungu cried because it didn't perform its duty in the agreed contract.
[ B.O.B © Copyright 2014, Night Runner Things]
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